The good news is TiVo saved the day and WTF I don't even need to write a blog because the transcript of this priceless moment really says it all:
Vernon [trying to get Laurieann to shut up]: Thank you, Laurieann.
Laurieann [as Johnny nods in support of her continued commenting despite Vernon's desperate "Thank yous"]: By the way, if you want to win, just pull up a little bit more, stretch those arms, and more dance! More dance!
Johnny [to Laurieann, approvingly]: Get it!
Vernon: Thank you, Laurieann. All right, Johnny! Thank you!
Johnny: The beginning of the program, I felt, was much more loose, much more fun, than it's LOOKED like you've had on the ice. The element at the end, the "Detroiter," was fantastic. You were nice and stiff and strong. But to me, it's very clear: You don't care what we think, and I don't really care to watch you actually perform anymore because you aren't listening to our critiques.
Ethan [nervously]: Well, we'll just get our, we'll just get our--we'll just get our scores then. (Is it just me or did he suddenly seem to erupt into fear-based babbling--not because of Johnny, of course, but because of Bethenny, the Skeletor-Faced Loon standing at his elbow with razor-sharp blades strapped to her feet?)
Bethenny [with apparent sarcasm]: Thanks. Thank you.
Laurieann: You know, you SHOULD care what they think.
Vernon [also nervously, since Bethenny is uncomfortably near ...] All right, OK OK OK OK OK...
Dick: Ha ha! Ha ha! I love it! I love it! I love it!
Vernon: Wow. Johnny Weir, you are FIERCE!
Johnny: Well, I mean, if she doesn't want to--if she doesn't care--
Vernon: FIERCE!
Johnny: --we DON'T CARE.
Laurieann: She cares ...
Dick [shaking Johnny with glee while Johnny makes a sort of "Z" sign in the air]: Go to it! Go to it, Johnny! Go to it!
Johnny: [???]
(I'm not sure what he says here. A quick poll of other crazy people who happened to be awake and on Twitter at 3 am yielded these guesses: "Pass"? "Harass"? "Her ass" (as in, "Let's cut her ass from this show")? Or just "ass," as in, "Could she possibly make a bigger one of herself?" Discuss.)
So. Really, what more could I add to such a masterful tour de force in cuttabitch delivered in less than 70 words other than simply: Ahhhhhhh. I spent the rest of my night basking in his brilliance and humming "Dirty Love" softly to myself while I made this .gif just for Julie Horowitz:
There's one thing that bothers me, though. After he says the Mysterious Word Which I Really Hope Is "Ass" Because She Is One, he sits back in his chair in a way that, coupled with the look on his face and kind of his whole demeanor throughout that scene, suggests to me he's a little upset. And I think, you know, after the Johnny lovefest that was Holiday Dreams on Ice, with the well-received premiere of "Dirty Love" and the opportunity to do what he loves and what fans love, which is, of course, for him to skate--it has to be hard to switch gears to SWTS and all its ridiculous drama, and to see an idiot like Bethenny display absolutely no respect for the sport that he has championed--literally--for so much of his life.
And then, of course, the haters were out in force on Twitter, tweeting stupid shit that isn't even worth the time it takes to run the search to find it. But a little while later, Johnny ended the night on a pitch-perfect note (as might be expected since he does, after all, have a pretty hot song coming out):
More brilliance. Still basking .... ("You think you know me / But I'll call your bluff...")
The next episode of Skating With the Stars
airs next Monday, December 20,
at 8 pm EST / 7 pm CST!
Don't miss it!
(Dear Santa: All I want for Weirmas
is STILL for Bethenny to please please just go away.)
(Dear Santa: All I want for Weirmas
is STILL for Bethenny to please please just go away.)
Please remember to check out
Johnny's new official website!
It debuted recently to many rave reviews
on Twitter and Facebook,
so be sure to take a look around!
Love the intro page with the Swan photo
and handwritten note from Johnny. :)
Johnny's new official website!
It debuted recently to many rave reviews
on Twitter and Facebook,
so be sure to take a look around!
Love the intro page with the Swan photo
and handwritten note from Johnny. :)
Designer T. Rains and Johnny have teamed up to raise money and awareness for The Trevor Project! This organization is "determined to end suicide among LGBTQ youth by providing life-saving and life-affirming resources." Proceeds from the "Army of One" t-shirt sales will go to The Trevor Project foundation. Order yours today! Your support is greatly appreciated!For more information, please visit www.thetrevorproject.org.
They have great tidbits to offer,
and you get a special sneak peek at an exclusive photo
from the Artbook when you sign up!
